Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
