hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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