all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
