Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
