beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
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