before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
