No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
