Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
