is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
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