Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
