We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Randomize
