I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
