The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
