do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Someone signed my nipple.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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