talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
She announced her abortion via fbk
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
