youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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