Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
