She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
