She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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