Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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