i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I'm sobbing to NWA
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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