Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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