Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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