Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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