I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Randomize
