Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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