Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
