I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
