whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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