he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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