Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
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