you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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