omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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