you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
