Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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