forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
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