after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
