dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
