Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
