If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Randomize
