so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
We need to get me chipped asap
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
