She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
