I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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