Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
