people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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