we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
