This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
