I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
