Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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