Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
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