so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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